Danny Oertli mentions Dan Trumble from the stage

Christmas Contest - Haiku

The Christmas writing contest for Christmas 2006 in the Colorado Springs newspaper, The Gazette, was a creative writing contest that had to include the following terms:

· Johnny Cash
· an American Girl doll
· red wine
· a full moon
· fruitcake

Here was my Haiku submission:

At this time of Yule
A nice gift from me to you
A Christmas haiku!

All great musicians
Record a Christmas album
During their careers

New songs aren’t needed
Just record all the classics
That everyone knows

The fans will line up
It’s just like printing money
Cha-ching! Easy cash

Bing Crosby did good
White Christmas and all of that
It’s a nice ditty

Bing had a good song
But many other artists
Go through the motions

As musical greats
They typically distinguish
Themselves otherwise

Elvis, the King who
Some believe to be deceased
Had many big hits:

Return to Sender,
Love me Tender, All Shook up
It’s Now or Never

Devil in Disguise,
Heartbreak Hotel, Don’t be Cruel,
That’s All Right (Mama)

Before moving on
Let’s give Elvis credit for
Blue Blue Blue Christmas

The Beatles were big
Also very prolific
(No thanks to Ringo)

George was pretty good
But nothing like John and Paul
They were amazing

Eleanor Rigby
Back in the USSR
Love Me Do, Hey Jude

8 Days a Week, Help!
While my Guitar Gently Weeps
Drive my Car, Taxman

They wrote many songs
But didn’t spend much effort
Writing Christmas songs

Neil Diamond was good
He wrote I’m a Believer
A big Monkees’ hit

Red, Red Wine, Shiloh
Sweet Caroline, Song Sung Blue
Kentucky Woman

And the great classic
You Don’t Bring me Flowers was
A big hit with Babs

Frank Sinatra was
Occasionally known as
Chairman of the Board

He had lots of hits
Valentine, New York New York
Luck be a Lady

For Once in My Life,
My Way, P.S. I Love You
Fly me to the Moon

Perhaps less well known
Was Full Moon and Empty Arms
Ah, yes…Old Blue Eyes

Who was first to be
Enshrined in both the Rock and
Country Halls of Fame?

It was none other
Than the late, great, Johnny Cash
Yes, the Man in Black

His Christmas Album
Isn’t anything to get
Excited about

But many other songs
Are really quite wonderful
There’s A Boy Named Sue,

One Piece at a Time,
John Henry, The Long Black Vail,
Folsom Prison Blues

There’s that Ring of Fire,
Sunday Morning Coming Down
And I Walk the Line

There is no time for
So many other artists
Ella Fitzgerald,

And Perry Como
Johnny Mathis, Nat King Cole,
And Louis Armstrong

And Judy Garland
Mel Torme, Tony Bennett
And Julie Andrews

Where is Tom Petty?
Well he’s not one of the greats
But here’s one question:

Who remade his song
American Girl? Dolls (the
Goo Goo Dolls that is)

So, after this long
Review of classic artists
It’s time to wrap up

Time to say goodbye.
Put on our Christmas records
From old days gone by

Before we are done
There is certainly one thing
We shouldn’t forget

After all of this fun
The most important of all:
God sent His Own Son.

Glad greetings to you.
Ho, Ho, Ho. Merry Christmas.
Go eat some fruitcake.


http://www2.gazette.com/display.php?id=1326951&secid=17

Here is basically the article that appeared in The Gazette introducing the contest

Unleash inner author

Contest kicks off

Want to play a game of Taboo?

This year’s version of The Gazette holiday fiction contest is the literary equivalent of the board game, giving you five elements you must include in your story and five elements you must not.

All entries must include: Johnny Cash, an American Girl doll, red wine, a full moon and fruitcake.

Entries must not include: orphans, puppies or kitties, trains, aliens or ghosts of dead relatives. (After reading thousands of holiday fiction entries over the years, Gazette staffers saw the offending elements a few too many times — especially the orphans.)

Besides the five taboo terms, the story is yours to create, as long as you infuse it with a holiday theme.

Last year’s contest attracted more than 200 writers. Winning entries in the adult and youth categories will receive prizes and be published in The Gazette on Dec. 24.

CONTEST RULES
Stories must be no longer than 1,200 words (about five typed, double-spaced pages).

Stories must be typed; no handwritten submissions. Stories must be original works not previously published and must include all five terms noted above without a single one of the taboo terms.

Entries must include name, age, address and phone number. School-age entrants also must include their grade. Entries are due by 5 p.m. Dec. 1.

Entries can be hand-delivered or mailed to Holiday Fiction Contest, The Gazette, 30 S. Prospect St., Colorado Springs 80903. Or e-mail bill. reed@gazette.com with “holiday fiction” in the subject line. No e-mail attachments, please; entries must be sent as the text of the e-mail.

Manuscripts become property of The Gazette and will not be returned. One entry per person.

Entry automatically grants permission for publication in The Gazette and posting on gazette.com. Judges’ decision is final. Official rules are at www. coloradosprings.com under “Fun and Games.”

Star Wars Haiku

I never did complete this but I began (and made some decent progress) on writing the story of the original Star Wars movie (Episode IV A New Hope) in haiku form.

Here it is thus far

A long time ago
In a galaxy far, far
Away…yup, Star Wars!

Leia trying to
Deliver secret plans for
The mighty Death Star

Da da da da da
Da da da da… Darth Vader
And Storm Troopers board

Leia, acting fast,
Gives the secret plans to a
Droid: R2D2

Vader captures her
But R2D2 escapes
With C3PO
Their escape pod is
Detected but allowed to leave
Due to no life forms

They land on the hot
sandy planet: Tatooine
The droids start walking

Tatooine is hot
The Jawas roam to and fro
Looking for lost droids

Jawas capture both
C3P0 and R2
And sell them to Luke

Luke Skywalker lives
With his Uncle Owen and
Aunt Beru. They farm.

While cleaning R2
Leia’s hidden message plays
“She is beautiful”

Luke tells R2 to
Play the message one more time
But R2 declines.

“I want to leave this
Year for the Academy”
Luke whines to Owen

“Only one more year”
Owen replies. Luke storms off,
Very frustrated

“Where are you going?”
“Nowhere, it looks like,” he whines.
Beru tells Owen,

“You can’t keep him here
Forever, he’s too much like
His father, you know”

Owen swallows hard.
“That is what I’m afraid of”
He tells Aunt Beru

R2D2 leaves
For Obiwan Kenobi
To give the message

Luke finds the droid gone
And vows that in the morning
He will find R2

Luke and Threepio
Race off in his Landspeeder
To look for R2

Luke, to his head, gets
A whack from one of the strange
Sandpeople creatures

Old Ben comes to save
Luke, Threepio, and R2
From the Sandperson

Luke asks Ben about
This Obiwan Kenobi
Does Ben know this guy?

“That’s a name I’ve not
Heard for a very long time”
Ben responds to Luke

“Know him? Yes I do.
He’s me.” Ben reveals to Luke.
“Let’s go to my cave”

Kenobi works on
R2 to see the message
Soon, it does appear

“Gen’ral Kenobi,
Years back, you helped my father,
During the Clone Wars.

“I have hidden plans
To the Empire’s Death Star
On this little droid

“It’s our darkest hour.
Help, Obiwan Kenobi,
You’re my only hope.”

Ben shows Luke his dad’s
Old lightsaber. He says Luke
Should do what seems best

Luke, Ben, the two droids,
Head off and find dead Jawas
Killed by Storm Troopers

Luke worries that if
the droids were traced this far, they
could be traced to…”Home!”

He races off but
Finds his uncle and aunt dead
And so he is sad

Ben’s comforting words,
“There’s nothing you could have done,
They’d have killed you too”

Luke, no longer has
Ties to Tatooine so he
Agrees to join Ben

Luke, Ben, and the Droids
Head off for the dangerous
Space port: Mos Eisley

Before entering
They are stopped at a checkpoint
Manned by Storm Troopers

They are looking for
The droid with the secret plans.
It’s R2 they want.

Old Ben waves his hand
Saying, “these are not the droids
You are looking for.”

The lead Storm Trooper
Replies, “These are not the droids
We are looking for.”

Old Ben continues,
“Move along” and the Trooper
Replies, “Move along”

Unbeknownst to him
He has experienced the
Jedi Mind Trick

Ben and Luke enter
A Cantina where Luke gets
Picked on by a guy

Ben has to use his
Lightsaber to protect Luke
And kills the guy dead

Han and Chewbacca
Meet with Guido who’s trying
To collect the debt

Han Solo owes to
The big lug, Jaba the Hut.
Han shoots Green Guido

Ben bargains with Han
For transport to Alderon
For the four of them

Han and Chewy fly
The Millennium Falcon,
A smuggling ship

Meanwhile, Darth Vader
Is not having much success
Questioning Leia

She claims she is on
A diplomatic mission
Where to? Alderon.

Back on the Falcon
They make the hyperspace jump
And relax a while

C3PO Learns
That it’s advisable to
Let a Wookie win

The way that he learns
Is by Chewy partially
Pulling off his arm

Luke gets a lesson
In lightsaber use from Ben.
He’s not good at first

Han is not impressed.
He likes to use a blaster
To dispatch his foes

Back on the Death Star
Grand Moff Tarkin and Vader
Keep Grilling Leia

“A Deomonstration,”
Tarkin suggests, “Shall we blow
Up Leia’s home world?”

“No!” Leia cries out
Alderson is a peaceful
Planet, don’t do it!

“Fine, I’ll tell you
What you want. Dantoonie is
Where the rebels are.”

“Good, Good,” Now Let’s Blow
Alderson up Anyway, “
Evil Tarkin says

Obiwan has a
Pain, as if from bad, bad gas
What could be the cause?

“A disturbance in
The Force, as if millions cried
Out, then fell silent”

The Falcon drops out
Of hyoerspace but they do
not find Alderon

Two TIE Fighters Greet
Them, so what does TIE stand for?
Twin Ion Engined.

They are no match for
The Millennium Falcon
And are shot down dead.